At my previous job, people would get mad at me for 'throwing someone under the bus' because I would simply tell the facts about a situation, and it ended up being that someone else screwed up. Apparently I was supposed to keep quiet and take all the wrath on myself instead.

That's what's happening here. I'm male, she's female, and it happened exactly the same way. She's taken a common (and bull) occurrence and decided it's sexist, when it's not. It's just a bad situation, possibly with a bad company.

What they're really telling her is that she should have taken one for the team, and they would have expected any other team member to do the same. She actually succeeded in her 'show no emotion' gambit, but had no idea she had done so.

I actually agree with her that women are accused of being emotional more than men are, and it's due to stereotypes.

And I agree with comments here that say men are just as emotional about their work. I certainly am.

But the problem isn't that women are told they are too emotional. It's that mean are -not- told that. And they need to be.