Apologies for skimming, but I didn't want to skip out on the conversation entirely....
I agree wholeheartedly about a balance between dependence and independence, and have posted on this subject before.
Stereotypes: roughly, that women are better at supporting/nurturing roles, are good with children and the infirm, are better at navigating the social world -- like knowing how to smooth ruffled feathers, etc.. Whereas men as more tone-deaf socially, but are better at raw intellectual or physical tasks -- "getting the job done". Which are the activities that, coincidentally, our culture also values more than "soft skills" (follow the money).
(Please note I am not saying these gender stereotypes are accurate or useful).
This is what I was hearing echoed in this: "She's my heart, my compass, and the sunshine keeping me where I need and want to be... even when my mighty intellect forgets to breath, feel, love, and live for a living."
See? You don't see "mighty" used to describe anything about women very often.
I hope I'm not coming across as judgmental, I'm just very wary of talking about groups in this way at all. It's not useful or factual to say that "women are men's superior in every way" -- if I were even in the business of saying which people are superior to which other people (I'm not) then I have to imagine it would be a big muddle of both genders.
We are first individuals, then we can be split up into groups by gender, origin, age... lots of factors, but we are individuals first.
So I still don't like talking about characteristics of "women" as a whole, as if they applied to all women (including specific, individual women you encounter in comment threads). It's not fair to the socially awkward, mighty-intellect women for one thing, and I don't think it's very helpful even to naturally warm and giving women either -- it praises them and limits them at the same time. If a person's gender gets credit for how wonderful they are, the individual doesn't.
It's better to praise the specific women in your life, I think. I seem to have ended up with most of my close friends being female, but that doesn't mean I like every woman I meet, or dislike every man. They're all individuals first, right? We're all better off working to avoid making assumptions based purely on something like gender, and simply dealing as much as possible with individuals.
I agree wholeheartedly about a balance between dependence and independence, and have posted on this subject before.
Stereotypes: roughly, that women are better at supporting/nurturing roles, are good with children and the infirm, are better at navigating the social world -- like knowing how to smooth ruffled feathers, etc.. Whereas men as more tone-deaf socially, but are better at raw intellectual or physical tasks -- "getting the job done". Which are the activities that, coincidentally, our culture also values more than "soft skills" (follow the money).
(Please note I am not saying these gender stereotypes are accurate or useful).
This is what I was hearing echoed in this: "She's my heart, my compass, and the sunshine keeping me where I need and want to be... even when my mighty intellect forgets to breath, feel, love, and live for a living."
See? You don't see "mighty" used to describe anything about women very often.
I hope I'm not coming across as judgmental, I'm just very wary of talking about groups in this way at all. It's not useful or factual to say that "women are men's superior in every way" -- if I were even in the business of saying which people are superior to which other people (I'm not) then I have to imagine it would be a big muddle of both genders.
We are first individuals, then we can be split up into groups by gender, origin, age... lots of factors, but we are individuals first.
So I still don't like talking about characteristics of "women" as a whole, as if they applied to all women (including specific, individual women you encounter in comment threads). It's not fair to the socially awkward, mighty-intellect women for one thing, and I don't think it's very helpful even to naturally warm and giving women either -- it praises them and limits them at the same time. If a person's gender gets credit for how wonderful they are, the individual doesn't.
It's better to praise the specific women in your life, I think. I seem to have ended up with most of my close friends being female, but that doesn't mean I like every woman I meet, or dislike every man. They're all individuals first, right? We're all better off working to avoid making assumptions based purely on something like gender, and simply dealing as much as possible with individuals.